Altruism and Cynicism

Ninety percent of everything is crap.

Theodore Sturgeon, in Altruism and Cynicism

A bore is a man who, when you ask him how he is, tells you.

Bert Leston Taylor, in Altruism and Cynicism

You can fool too many of the people too much of the time.

James Thurber, in Altruism and Cynicism

Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain.

Lily Tomlin, in Altruism and Cynicism

It's a recession when your neighbor loses his job; it's a depression when you lose yours.

Harry S Truman, in Altruism and Cynicism

A rumor without a leg to stand on will get around some other way.

John Tudor, in Altruism and Cynicism

Few things are harder to put up with than a good example.

Mark Twain, in Altruism and Cynicism

Good breeding consists of concealing how much we think of ourselves and how little we think of the other person.

Mark Twain, in Altruism and Cynicism

I am prepared to meet anyone, but whether anyone is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me is another matter.

Mark Twain, in Altruism and Cynicism

Man is the only animal that blushes -- or needs to.

Mark Twain, in Altruism and Cynicism

Never tell the truth to those unworthy of it.

Mark Twain, in Altruism and Cynicism

The fact that man knows right from wrong proves his intellectual superiority to other creatures; but the fact that he can do wrong proves his moral inferiority to any creature that cannot.

Mark Twain, What is Man?, 1906, in Altruism and Cynicism

Black, white, brown, yellow or even red, we piss with our pants down, and go naked to bed.

Mark van Essen, in Altruism and Cynicism

Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity.

Robert J. Hanlon, in Altruism and Cynicism and Vice and Virtue