Aphorisms Galore!

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Aphorisms Galore! lets you Feed Your Wit by browsing, searching, submitting, and discussing aphorisms and witty sayings by famous and not-so-famous people.

Welcome! The computer thought you might be interested in these aphorisms today, taking into account things like their recent popularities and how new they are to the collection:

tiny.ag/vkpbru1q  ·  submitted 1997

In Dr. Johnson's famous dictionary, "patriotism" is defined as the last resort of the scoundrel. With all due respect to an enlightened but inferior lexicographer, I beg to submit that it is the first.

Ambrose Bierce, in Law and Politics

tiny.ag/pmqy9n03  ·  submitted 1997

It's better to waste one's youth than to do nothing with it at all.

Georges Courteline, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/dozch5ts  ·  submitted 1997

Most of life is choices, and the rest is pure dumb luck.

Marian Erickson, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/yefighwf  ·  submitted 1999

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.

Robert A. Heinlein, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/bgvxtarp  ·  submitted 1997

I find that the harder I work, the more luck I seem to have.

Thomas Jefferson, in Success and Failure and Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/koexwc3k  ·  submitted 1997

Man is able to do what he is unable to imagine. His head trails a wake through the galaxy of the absurd.

René Char, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/nxwvhtlg  ·  submitted 1997

Women who seek to be equal with men lack ambition.

Timothy Leary, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/jwhevbgo  ·  submitted 1997

My theology, briefly, is that the universe was dictated but not signed.

Christopher Morley, in Science and Religion

tiny.ag/bqie1hj5  ·  submitted 1998

An aphorism is not an aphorism unless you know what it means.

Winston Churchill, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/kjm5ugma  ·  submitted 1997

Change occurs in direct proportion to dissatisfaction, but dissatisfaction never changes.

Doug Horton, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/mb7skahf  ·  submitted 1997

It is people who live by the rules that are always hoping to get them changed.

Robert Harbison, in Law and Politics

tiny.ag/yio6tuyz  ·  submitted 1997

Deep Thoughts (paperback)

The face of a child can say it all, especially the mouth part of the face.

Jack Handey, Deep Thoughts, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/y7qkjsrf  ·  submitted 1997

Uncertainty and mystery are energies of life. Don't let them scare you unduly, for they keep boredom at bay and spark creativity.

R. I. Fitzhenry, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/iqolobqc  ·  submitted 1997

In order to preserve your self-respect, it is sometimes necessary to lie and cheat.

Robert Byrne, in Vice and Virtue

tiny.ag/g9nfhw0y  ·  submitted 1997

Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal.

Albert Camus, in Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/br8cx6zt  ·  submitted 1997

I have learned to use the word "impossible" with the greatest caution.

Werner von Braun, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/hrd6aj12  ·  submitted 1997

A pint of sweat saves a gallon of blood.

George Patton, in War and Peace and Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/yuezt1iy  ·  submitted 1997

A painting in a museum probably hears more foolish remarks than anything else in the world.

Edmond Jules Goncourt, in Art and Literature

tiny.ag/dxbh08ml  ·  submitted 1997

Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly.

Robert F. Kennedy, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/mnrh4p2b  ·  submitted 1997

Always forgive your enemies, but never forget their names.

John F. Kennedy, in Altruism and Cynicism and Vice and Virtue