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Life is like a sewer -- what you get out of it depends on what you put into it.

 Tom Lehrer, (from the album An Evening Wasted), in  Life and Death

I don't feel good.

 Luther Burbank, (dying words), in  Life and Death

When angry, count to ten before you speak; when very angry, a hundred.

 Thomas Jefferson, Writings, in  Wisdom and Ignorance

It was involuntary. They sank my boat.

 John F. Kennedy, (comment when asked about his heroism), in  War and Peace

I never think of the future -- it will come soon enough.

 Albert Einstein, in  Life and Death

My sources are unreliable, but their information is fascinating.

 Ashleigh Brilliant, Brilliant Thoughts (copyright info: www.ashleighbrilliant.com), in  Science and Religion

He that would perfect his work must first sharpen his tools.

 Confucius, in  Work and Recreation

There is more to life than increasing its speed.

 Mahatma Gandhi, in  Happiness and Misery

The shepherd drives the wolf from the sheep's throat, for which the sheep thanks the shepherd as his liberator, while the wolf denounces him for the same act as the destroyer of liberty.

 Abraham Lincoln, in  Law and Politics

There is no security on this earth; there is only opportunity.

 Douglas MacArthur, in  Success and Failure

A woman is only a woman, but a good cigar is a smoke.

 Rudyard Kipling, in  Men and Women and  Vice and Virtue

Never mistake knowledge for wisdom. One helps you make a living; the other helps you make a life.

 Sandra Carey, in  Wisdom and Ignorance

I wouldn't mind dying -- it's that business of having to stay dead that scares the shit out of me.

 R. Geis, in  Life and Death

I would rather be attacked than unnoticed. For the worst thing you can do to an author is to be silent as to his works.

 Samuel Johnson, in  Art and Literature

Leemans' Law: Junk expands to fill the space allotted.

 Ron Leemans, in  Work and Recreation

To generalize is to be an idiot.

 William Blake, in  Science and Religion

Even thinking is participation.

 Lassi Kämäri, in  Wisdom and Ignorance

To be prepared against surprise is to be trained. To be prepared for surprise is to be educated.

 James Carse, in  Life and Death

He has half the deed done who has made a beginning.

 Horace, in  Work and Recreation

Happiness isn't something you experience; it's something you remember.

 Oscar Levant, in  Happiness and Misery