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Aphorisms Galore! lets you Feed Your Wit by browsing, searching, submitting, and discussing aphorisms and witty sayings by famous and not-so-famous people.
Welcome! The computer thought you might be interested in these aphorisms today, taking into account things like their recent popularities and how new they are to the collection:
tiny.ag/iht7l65u · submitted 1997
Egotism is the anesthetic given by a kindly nature to relieve the pain of being a damned fool.
tiny.ag/04lm8ot1 · submitted 1997
Passionate hatred can give meaning and purpose to an empty life.
tiny.ag/e87wmjqg · submitted 1997
The end of the human race will be that it will eventually die of civilization.
tiny.ag/npf5ywfi · submitted 1997
He that would perfect his work must first sharpen his tools.
tiny.ag/wtukmszr · submitted 1997
A bank is a place where they lend you an umbrella in fair weather and ask for it back when it begins to rain.
tiny.ag/kgnpd9wc · submitted 1998
Even thinking is participation.
tiny.ag/kl7xzzq3 · submitted 1997
An eye for an eye would make the whole world blind.
tiny.ag/7alftveq · submitted 1997
I don't know with what weapons World War III will be fought, but World War IV will be fought with sticks and stones.
tiny.ag/odq1svy5 · submitted 1997
We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up.
tiny.ag/axybc0uz · submitted 1997
With love and patience, nothing is impossible.
tiny.ag/f6aon4ji · submitted 1998
Never try to out-stubborn a cat.
Robert A. Heinlein, The Notebooks of Lazarus Long, in Success and Failure
tiny.ag/hifvkpkc · submitted 1997
A lot of people mistake a short memory for a clear conscience.
tiny.ag/9bumiall · submitted 1997
There's nothing so useless as doing efficiently that which should not be done at all.
tiny.ag/kygnp58l · submitted 1997
To be prepared against surprise is to be trained. To be prepared for surprise is to be educated.
tiny.ag/nvfl7j9k · submitted 1997
Don't worry about people stealing your ideas. If your ideas are any good, you'll have to ram them down people's throats.
tiny.ag/g9nfhw0y · submitted 1997
Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal.
tiny.ag/vfmz7cvr · submitted 1997
If you want a high performance woman, I can go from zero to bitch in less than 2.1 seconds.
tiny.ag/r3davdhl · submitted 1997
In war, there is no substitute for victory.
tiny.ag/aoh5h6tb · submitted 1999
Everybody wants to save the earth; nobody wants to help Mom do the dishes.
P. J. O'Rourke, All the Trouble in the World, in Altruism and Cynicism and Work and Recreation
tiny.ag/hobsgyde · submitted 1997
Why be a man when you can be a success?