Life and Death
196 aphorisms · 11 comments
Aphorisms in This Category
1–20 (196)
tiny.ag/f70nm4cm · submitted 1999
All I desire for my own burial is not to be buried alive.
tiny.ag/uxknfqoq · submitted 1997
Try to get all of your posthumous medals in advance.
Unknown, in Life and Death and Success and Failure
tiny.ag/yqwcpnfd · submitted 1997
To live a perfect life, you must ask nothing, give nothing, and expect nothing.
tiny.ag/zpdgt5p3 · submitted 1997
The secret to life is that there is no secret.
tiny.ag/jmnes1bp · submitted 1997
The older a man gets, the farther he had to walk to school as a boy.
tiny.ag/26yeyslg · submitted 1997
The best thing about growing older is that it takes such a long time.
tiny.ag/satycnrw · submitted 1997
Even the best of friends cannot attend each other's funeral.
tiny.ag/hl6bwuua · submitted 1997
The chief danger in life is that you may take too many precautions.
tiny.ag/tvfsj7gx · submitted 1997
I don't feel good.
Luther Burbank, (dying words), in Life and Death
tiny.ag/diamcwob · submitted 1997
Death meant little to me. It was the last joke in a series of bad jokes.
tiny.ag/mqbuthzj · submitted 1997 by Brad Johnson
I'd rather die while I'm living than live while I'm dead.
tiny.ag/up1actjs · submitted 1997
Decay is inherent in all compounded things. Strive on with diligence.
Unknown, (sometimes, almost certainly incorrectly, attributed to the Buddha), in Life and Death
tiny.ag/lu1wfeec · submitted 1997
Life is a tragedy for those who feel, and a comedy for those who think.
tiny.ag/9xelzoym · submitted 1997
Life is a tragedy for those who feel, and a comedy for those who think, and a docudrama with ugly actors for those who film docudramas.
tiny.ag/tuvabnig · submitted 1999
Death is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down. The difference between sex and death is that with death you can do it alone and no one is going to make fun of you.
Woody Allen, in Life and Death and Love and Hate
tiny.ag/znmoyas0 · submitted 1997
I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve immortality by living forever.
tiny.ag/8dojvkdg · submitted 1997
Too much credit is given to the end result. The true lesson is in the struggle that takes place between the dream and reality. That struggle is a thing called life!
tiny.ag/p2zj718l · submitted 1997
The only absolute knowledge worth attaining is that your life is meaningless. -- My life? Well now, that's another story...
tiny.ag/6vqkumld · submitted 1997
Just because your doctor has a name for your condition doesn't mean he knows what it is.
tiny.ag/jmkw4qmh · submitted 1997
Life is a fatal, sexually transmitted disease.
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