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420 aphorisms  ·  5 comments

Aphorisms Attributed to This Aphorist

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Comment#  ·   Fair (1079 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997  · 

We trained hard, but it seemed that everytime we were beginning to form up into teams, we would be reorganized. I was to learn later in life that we tend to meet any new situation by reorganizing; and a wonderful method it can be for creating the illusion of progress while producing confusion, inefficiency and demoralization.

Unknown, (sometimes incorrectly attributed to Petronius Arbiter), in Work and Recreation

Comment#  ·   Fair (185 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

You can't carve your way to success without cutting remarks.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

Comment#  ·   Fair (246 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

You cannot achieve the impossible without attempting the absurd.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

Comment#  ·   Fair (185 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

You cannot discover new oceans unless you have the courage to lose sight of the shore.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

Comment#  ·   Fair (223 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997  · 

You cannot produce a baby in one month by impregnating nine women.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

Comment#  ·   Fair (294 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

You draw nothing out of the bank of life except what you deposit in it.

Unknown, in Life and Death

Comment#  ·   Fair (217 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

You may only have two of the three choices: (1) Enjoy your job. (2)Work within the law. (3)Make lots of money.

Unknown, in Work and Recreation

Comment#  ·   Fair (203 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

You should emulate your heroes, but don't carry it too far. Especially if they are dead.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

Comment#  ·   Fair (208 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

You're a genius if you fly a kite during a thunderstorm, and discover that lightning is electricity -- but you're an idiot if you fly a kite during a thunderstorm, and discover that lightning can kill you.

Unknown, (from Mad Magazine), in Success and Failure

Comment#  ·   Fair (672 ratings)  ·  submitted 1998

Always remember your weapons system was made by the lowest bidder

Unknown, in War and Peace

Comment#  ·   Fair (701 ratings)  ·  submitted 1998

Give a man a fish and he'll ask for a lemon. Teach a man to fish and he'll leave work early on Friday.

Unknown, in Work and Recreation

Comment#  ·   Fair (269 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

War is menstruation envy.

Unknown, in War and Peace

Comment#  ·   Fair (258 ratings)  ·  submitted 1998

Waste not fresh tears over old griefs.

Unknown, in Happiness and Misery

Comment#  ·   Fair (257 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Wasting time is an important part of living.

Unknown, in Work and Recreation

Comment#  ·   Fair (171 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Watch for big problems; they disguise big opportunities.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

Comment#  ·   Fair (257 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

We should forgive our enemies, but only after they've been taken out and shot.

Unknown, in Altruism and Cynicism

Comment#  ·   Fair (198 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Weiler's Law: Nothing is impossible for the man who doesn't have to do it himself.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

Comment#  ·   Fair (209 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Well-timed silence hath more eloquence than speech.

Unknown, in Wisdom and Ignorance

Comment#  ·   Fair (244 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Westheimer's Discovery: A couple of months in the laboratory can frequently save a couple of hours in the library.

Unknown, in Work and Recreation

Comment#  ·   Fair (146 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Wethern's Law: Assumption is the mother of all screw-ups.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

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