Unknown

Give a man a fish and he'll ask for a lemon. Teach a man to fish and he'll leave work early on Friday.

Unknown, in Work and Recreation

You are only young once... but you can be immature your whole life.

Unknown, in Life and Death and Wisdom and Ignorance

You can tell a lot about a person by looking at what kind of people are his friends and children.

Unknown, in Wisdom and Ignorance

You can't carve your way to success without cutting remarks.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

You cannot achieve the impossible without attempting the absurd.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

You cannot discover new oceans unless you have the courage to lose sight of the shore.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

You cannot produce a baby in one month by impregnating nine women.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

You may only have two of the three choices: (1) Enjoy your job. (2)Work within the law. (3)Make lots of money.

Unknown, in Work and Recreation

You should emulate your heroes, but don't carry it too far. Especially if they are dead.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

You're a genius if you fly a kite during a thunderstorm, and discover that lightning is electricity -- but you're an idiot if you fly a kite during a thunderstorm, and discover that lightning can kill you.

Unknown, (from Mad Magazine), in Success and Failure

Always remember your weapons system was made by the lowest bidder

Unknown, in War and Peace

You draw nothing out of the bank of life except what you deposit in it.

Unknown, in Life and Death

Watch for big problems; they disguise big opportunities.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

We should forgive our enemies, but only after they've been taken out and shot.

Unknown, in Altruism and Cynicism

Weiler's Law: Nothing is impossible for the man who doesn't have to do it himself.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

Well-timed silence hath more eloquence than speech.

Unknown, in Wisdom and Ignorance

Westheimer's Discovery: A couple of months in the laboratory can frequently save a couple of hours in the library.

Unknown, in Work and Recreation

When a man's wife learns to understand him, she usually stops listening to him.

Unknown, in Men and Women

When an ordinary man attains knowledge, he is a sage; when a sage attains knowledge, he is an ordinary man.

Unknown, (Zen saying), in Wisdom and Ignorance

Under the most rigorously controlled conditions of pressure, temperature, volume, humidity, and other variables, the organism will do as it damn well pleases.

Unknown, in Science and Religion