Aphorisms Galore!

Life and Death

196 aphorisms  ·  11 comments

Aphorisms in This Category

tiny.ag/h7w28305  ·  submitted 1997

Death is nature's way of telling you to slow down.

Unknown, in Life and Death and Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/b94hkcka  ·  submitted 1997

Do not regret growing older. It is a privilege denied to many.

Unknown, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/74zlcnif  ·  submitted 1997

Don't die until you're dead.

Unknown, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/nrkqajzx  ·  submitted 1997

Don't worry over what other people are thinking about you. They're too busy worrying over what you are thinking about them.

Unknown, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/vbn3b1au  ·  submitted 1997

Ducharm's Axiom: If you view your problem closely enough you will recognize yourself as part of the problem.

Unknown, in Life and Death and Success and Failure

tiny.ag/jnvbea3l  ·  submitted 1999 by Glenn Troester

Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.

Unknown, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/ncueqfib  ·  submitted 1997

Eat a live toad in the morning and nothing worse will happen to you for the rest of the day.

Unknown, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/gcj36kvs  ·  submitted 1999 by pam brees

Every time a baby is born, so is a grandmother.

Unknown, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/tpxrfoyh  ·  submitted 1997

Everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die.

Unknown, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/iltu4sq1  ·  submitted 1997

Fairy tales: Horror stories for children to get them used to reality.

Unknown, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/9djxhqx6  ·  submitted 1997

If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.

Earl Wilson, in Altruism and Cynicism and Life and Death

tiny.ag/ilv3oim9  ·  submitted 1997

Life is an unbroken succession of false situations.

Thornton Wilder, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/8tw9d5gh  ·  submitted 1999 by E. Lechner

Either those curtains go or I do.

Oscar Wilde, (last words), in Life and Death

tiny.ag/9exdprka  ·  submitted 1997

I am not afraid of tomorrow, for I have seen yesterday and I love today.

William Allen White, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/nzeglr2h  ·  submitted 1997

In the end, everything is a gag.

Charlie Chaplin, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/q2py4esl  ·  submitted 1997

Let us so live that when we come to die, even the undertaker will be sorry.

Mark Twain, in Life and Death and Vice and Virtue

tiny.ag/9xelzoym  ·  submitted 1997

Life is a tragedy for those who feel, and a comedy for those who think, and a docudrama with ugly actors for those who film docudramas.

Dr. Squid, in Altruism and Cynicism and Life and Death

tiny.ag/o805qiwx  ·  submitted 1997

After I'm dead, I'd rather have people ask why I have no monument than why I have one.

Marcus Porcius Cato, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/p2zj718l  ·  submitted 1997

The only absolute knowledge worth attaining is that your life is meaningless. -- My life? Well now, that's another story...

Dr. Squid, in Altruism and Cynicism and Life and Death

tiny.ag/fnthysbd  ·  submitted 1997

Any idiot can face a crisis; it is this day-to-day living that wears you out.

Anton Chekhov, in Life and Death