Unknown

If bankers can count, how come they have eight windows and only four tellers?

Unknown, in Work and Recreation

If at first you don't succeed, skydiving isn't for you.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

If at first you don't succeed, redefine success.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?

Unknown, in Wisdom and Ignorance

If I can be of any help, you're in worse trouble than I thought.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

I've had one child. My husband wants to have another. I'd like to watch <EM>him</EM> have another.

Unknown, in Men and Women

I'm prepared for all emergencies but totally unprepared for everyday life.

Unknown, in Life and Death

I'm not afraid of work... I can even sleep beside it.

Unknown, in Vice and Virtue and Work and Recreation

I'd rather be rich than stupid.

Unknown, in Success and Failure and Wealth and Poverty

I'd like to meet the man who invented sex and see what he's working on now.

Unknown, in Love and Hate and Vice and Virtue

I wish I were what I was when I wanted to be what I am now.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

I used to think I was indecisive, but now I'm not so sure.

Unknown, in Wisdom and Ignorance

Experience is often what you get when you were expecting something else.

Unknown, in Wisdom and Ignorance

Everybody should believe in something -- I believe I'll have another drink.

Unknown, in Vice and Virtue

Everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die.

Unknown, in Life and Death

Everyone smiles in the same language.

Unknown, in Happiness and Misery

Everything is controlled by a small evil group to which, unfortunately, no one we know belongs.

Unknown, in Altruism and Cynicism

Everything you do or say is public relations.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

Familiarity breeds contempt.

Unknown, in Altruism and Cynicism