Aphorisms Galore!

Men and Women

52 aphorisms  ·  11 comments

Aphorisms in This Category

tiny.ag/ymbukbew  ·  submitted 1997

When a man's wife learns to understand him, she usually stops listening to him.

Unknown, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/n51jrfp4  ·  submitted 1997

When a female has tears in her eyes the one who cannot see is the male.

Unknown, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/ba1k2myj  ·  submitted 1999 by Falcon

Men don't need women -- they just need certain parts of their anatomy.

Unknown, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/i3egysnq  ·  submitted 1997

Men who cherish for women the highest respect are seldom popular with them.

Unknown, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/c8lfkzap  ·  submitted 1997

My wife says I never listen to her. At least I think that's what she says.

Unknown, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/wrcm1vhx  ·  submitted 1997

The more I know men, the more I love my dog.

Unknown, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/tr9cqzsg  ·  submitted 1997

Sex is what women have and men want.

Unknown, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/u0wakq2d  ·  submitted 1997

Nature has given women so much power that the law has very wisely given them little.

Unknown, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/hf3tbwd4  ·  submitted 1997

My notion of a wife at forty is that a man should be able to change her, like a bank note, for two twenties.

Douglas Jerrold, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/oujtda0e  ·  submitted 1997

Bachelors know more about women than married men do. If they didn't, they'd be married too.

Henry Louis Mencken, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/dccyeyhv  ·  submitted 1997

A man is as good as he has to be, and a woman is as bad as she dares.

Elbert Hubbard, in Men and Women and Vice and Virtue

tiny.ag/tcrvsd4o  ·  submitted 1997

Women first want to find out what is in your wallet, and second what is in your pants.

Unknown, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/exb7lihg  ·  submitted 1997

I've had one child. My husband wants to have another. I'd like to watch him have another.

Unknown, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/ipnqtb0n  ·  submitted 1997

If the effort that went in research on the female bosom had gone into our space program, we would now be running hot dog stands on the moon.

Unknown, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/vw1afyvg  ·  submitted 1999 by Reginald Williams

If you have been involved with or enjoyed the company of a female for 6 months to a year, then you can say that you know a woman. If you have been involved with or enjoyed the company of a female for 1 to 4 years, then you can say that you understand a woman. If you have been involved with or enjoyed the company of a female for 4 or more years, then you can say that you have learned from a woman.

Reginald Williams, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/ahwnboyz  ·  submitted 1997

A woman never forgets the men she could have had; a man, the women he couldn't.

Unknown, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/uakf86jl  ·  submitted 1997

A woman has to be twice as good as a man, to be regarded as half that clever.

Unknown, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/tbfksj3l  ·  submitted 1997

You come out of a woman and you spend the rest of your life trying to get back inside.

Heathcote Williams, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/7j6zgqod  ·  submitted 1997

A diplomat is a man who can convince his wife she'd look stout in a fur coat.

Unknown, in Law and Politics and Men and Women

tiny.ag/axmzaeli  ·  submitted 1997

A man needs a mistress, just to break the monogamy.

Unknown, in Love and Hate and Men and Women