Altruism and Cynicism
173 aphorisms · 15 comments
Aphorisms in This Category
101–120 (174)
tiny.ag/vwaksnik · ★★☆☆ Fair (453 ratings) · submitted 1997
The only thing worse than being talked about is not being talked about.
tiny.ag/0fxuodhb · ★★☆☆ Fair (460 ratings) · submitted 1997
The pure and simple truth is rarely pure and never simple.
tiny.ag/knyvxbon · ★★☆☆ Fair (232 ratings) · submitted 1997
Whenever people agree with me I always feel I must be wrong.
tiny.ag/9djxhqx6 · ★★☆☆ Fair (116 ratings) · submitted 1997
If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.
tiny.ag/td1vfiu9 · ★★☆☆ Fair (121 ratings) · submitted 1997
Cynics regard everybody as equally corrupt... Idealists regard everybody as equally corrupt, except themselves.
tiny.ag/r1bfukdv · ★★☆☆ Fair (350 ratings) · submitted 1997
Few things are harder to put up with than a good example.
tiny.ag/q6kxew3z · ★★☆☆ Fair (304 ratings) · submitted 1997
Good breeding consists of concealing how much we think of ourselves and how little we think of the other person.
tiny.ag/sdmeheo7 · ★★☆☆ Fair (301 ratings) · submitted 1997
I am prepared to meet anyone, but whether anyone is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me is another matter.
tiny.ag/gymh6otw · ★★☆☆ Fair (146 ratings) · submitted 1997
Man is the only animal that blushes -- or needs to.
tiny.ag/ne1vhxlr · ★★☆☆ Fair (119 ratings) · submitted 1997
Never tell the truth to those unworthy of it.
tiny.ag/7do2rifh · ★★☆☆ Fair (140 ratings) · submitted 1997
The fact that man knows right from wrong proves his intellectual superiority to other creatures; but the fact that he can do wrong proves his moral inferiority to any creature that cannot.
Mark Twain, What is Man?, 1906, in Altruism and Cynicism
tiny.ag/r6bo5aic · ★★☆☆ Fair (234 ratings) · submitted 1998 by Mark van Essen
Black, white, brown, yellow or even red, we piss with our pants down, and go naked to bed.
tiny.ag/otpgz4zj · ★★☆☆ Fair (93 ratings) · submitted 1997
A narcissist is someone better looking than you are.
tiny.ag/5otyux70 · ★★☆☆ Fair (121 ratings) · submitted 1997
I have never made but one prayer to God, a very short one: "O Lord, make my enemies ridiculous." And God granted it.
tiny.ag/58hbs9pq · ★★☆☆ Fair (67 ratings) · submitted 1997
It's not true that nice guys finish last. Nice guys are winners before the game even starts.
tiny.ag/amzxlbug · ★★☆☆ Fair (148 ratings) · submitted 1997
All humans are hypocrites; the biggest hypocrite of all is the one who claims to detest hypocrisy.
tiny.ag/k8lcsqdw · ★★☆☆ Fair (934 ratings) · submitted 1997
Heck, what's a little extortion among friends?
Bill Watterson, Calvin and Hobbes, in Altruism and Cynicism
tiny.ag/dliywafc · ★★☆☆ Fair (888 ratings) · submitted 1997
I know the world isn't fair, but why isn't it ever unfair in my favor?
Bill Watterson, Calvin and Hobbes, in Altruism and Cynicism
tiny.ag/764yzbuo · ★★☆☆ Fair (233 ratings) · submitted 1997
I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants.
tiny.ag/fmchbiz9 · ★★☆☆ Fair (387 ratings) · submitted 1997
The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans is suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they're okay, then it's you.
101–120 (174)