Submissions
These aphorisms have been submitted by users but are not (yet) included in the official collection.
5061–5080 (5228)
tiny.ag/vgjtesch · ★★☆☆ Fair (18 ratings) · submitted 2001
The consensus seemed to be that if really large numbers of men were sent to storm the mountain, then enough might survive the rocks to take the citadel. This is essentially the basis of all military thinking.
Terry Pratchett, From the book "Eric"
tiny.ag/esvsxaht · ★★☆☆ Fair (17 ratings) · submitted 2001
No matter how fast light travels it finds the darkness has always got there first, and is waiting for it.
Terry Pratchett, From the book "Reaper Man"
tiny.ag/ree9gkwm · ★★☆☆ Fair (21 ratings) · submitted 2001
In fact, the mere act of opening the box will determine the state of the cat, although in this case there were three determinate states the cat could be in: these being Alive, Dead, and Bloody Furious.
Terry Pratchett, From the book "Lords and Ladies"
tiny.ag/ar3pcxni · ★★☆☆ Fair (13 ratings) · submitted 2001
The question seldom addressed is where Medusa had snakes. Underarm hair is an even more embarassing problem when it keeps biting the top of the deodorant bottle.
Terry Pratchett, From the book "Soul Music"
tiny.ag/m4uzf7p5 · ★★☆☆ Fair (8 ratings) · submitted 2001
People's whole lives do pass in front of their eyes before they die - the process is called 'Living'.
Terry Pratchett, From the book "The Last Continent"
tiny.ag/vadyliip · ★★☆☆ Fair (15 ratings) · submitted 2001
Pets are always a great help in times of stress. And in times of starvation too, o'course.
Terry Pratchett, From the book "Small Gods"
tiny.ag/3shvtqmw · ★★☆☆ Fair (15 ratings) · submitted 2001
And, while it was regarded as pretty good evidence of criminality to be living in a slum, for some reason owning a whole street of them merely got you invited to the very best social occasions.
Terry Pratchett, From the book "Feet of Clay"
tiny.ag/kflzrexd · ★★☆☆ Fair (14 ratings) · submitted 2001
Give a man a fire and he's warm for a day, but set fire to him and he's warm for the rest of his life.
Terry Pratchett, From the book Jingo
tiny.ag/qhrvkewq · ★★☆☆ Fair (13 ratings) · submitted 2001
One of the universal rules of happiness is: always be wary of any helpful item that weighs less than its operating manual.
Terry Pratchett, From the book Jingo
tiny.ag/jxbvaunc · ★★☆☆ Fair (17 ratings) · submitted 2001
"Life is change. If you can't change, you can't live."
tiny.ag/xzceap5h · ★★☆☆ Fair (23 ratings) · submitted 2001
How can I miss you if you won't go away?
tiny.ag/ujokmpje · ★★☆☆ Fair (16 ratings) · submitted 2001
No tyrant ever died of paper cuts.
tiny.ag/hrluu7ix · ★★☆☆ Fair (23 ratings) · submitted 2001
I am of the conviction that most people believe in God only so that they can have someone to blame.
tiny.ag/8dpmcodb · ★★☆☆ Fair (19 ratings) · submitted 2001
Those who can, do. Those who can't teach.
Then there are those who manage to get by.
John T. Evans, With aplologies to H. L. Mencken.
tiny.ag/gzdk7wbf · ★★☆☆ Fair (21 ratings) · submitted 2001
My best advice for dealing with liberal celebrities is this: treat them as you would any other circus monkey-- a creature that is cute, amusing and oh so clever, but when confronted with a superior intellect is only capable of screeching and flinging poop at it.
tiny.ag/glrjuqoa · ★★☆☆ Fair (14 ratings) · submitted 2001
Hypocrisy breeds contempt
tiny.ag/fwsvgtl4 · ★★☆☆ Fair (22 ratings) · submitted 2001
Home is A place you can't be turned away from, can't be asked to leave and can grow some food if you're poor.
It's part of The American Way of HomeLife, Liberty and The Pursuit of Happiness (Home, Sweet Home with God/Love). Luke9:58, John10:10, 1Cor12:26, Luke10:27, Deut6:5 & 1John4:16 KJV1776
David Andrew Nunnery, http://theamway.injesus.com/
tiny.ag/kmbjcvwx · ★★★☆ Good (6 ratings) · submitted 2001
You know nothing, and that's a fact.
tiny.ag/wbvxhx7u · ★★☆☆ Fair (18 ratings) · submitted 2001
"The mark of the immature man is that he wants to die nobly for a cause, while the mark of the mature man is that he wants to live humbly for one"
tiny.ag/oiihv6mw · ★★☆☆ Fair (21 ratings) · submitted 2001
"When you're drowning, you don't say 'I would be incredibly pleased if someone would have the foresight to notice me drowning and come and help me,' you just scream."
5061–5080 (5228)