Aphorisms Galore!

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Aphorisms Galore! lets you Feed Your Wit by browsing, searching, submitting, and discussing aphorisms and witty sayings by famous and not-so-famous people.

Welcome! The computer thought you might be interested in these aphorisms today, taking into account things like their recent popularities and how new they are to the collection:

tiny.ag/poggndv0  ·  submitted 1997

Be polite to all, but intimate with few.

Thomas Jefferson, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/tymlwb79  ·  submitted 1997

For a man to achieve all that is demanded of him, he must regard himself as greater than he is.

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, in Vice and Virtue and Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/i0nu42ok  ·  submitted 1997

The difference between fiction and reality is that fiction has to make sense.

Tom Clancy, in Art and Literature

tiny.ag/gwiaxqqe  ·  submitted 1997

Nothing is more intolerable than to have to admit to yourself your own errors.

Ludwig van Beethoven, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/pbhm4rie  ·  submitted 1997

Man is the only animal that can remain on friendly terms with the victims he intends to eat until he eats them.

Samuel Butler, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/uz9atcqm  ·  submitted 1997

The right to be heard does not automatically include the right to be taken seriously.

Hubert H. Humphrey, in Law and Politics

tiny.ag/gu6tloek  ·  submitted 1997

An honest politician is one who, when he is bought, will stay bought.

Simon Cameron, in Altruism and Cynicism and Law and Politics

tiny.ag/fwsozshx  ·  submitted 1997

If you have a bowl of apples and you eat the best ones first, then you have only the best ones left.

Shelly Horton, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/5rylx71v  ·  submitted 1997

Efficiency is intelligent laziness.

David Dunham, in Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/8hodlqqe  ·  submitted 1997

People seem not to see that their opinion of the world is also a confessor of character.

Ralph Waldo Emerson, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/yamidgsg  ·  submitted 1999

Ignorance does not necesarilly mean one has a lack of wisdom, for a most ignorant person can be one with much wisdom. It's "live and learn" that creates wisdom.

Austin Holmes, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/hrd6aj12  ·  submitted 1997

A pint of sweat saves a gallon of blood.

George Patton, in War and Peace and Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/la65dtiv  ·  submitted 1998

It was involuntary. They sank my boat.

John F. Kennedy, (comment when asked about his heroism), in War and Peace

tiny.ag/g9nfhw0y  ·  submitted 1997

Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal.

Albert Camus, in Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/1i8zitnu  ·  submitted 1998

I wish to have no connection with any ship that does not sail fast; for I intend to go in harms way.

John Paul Jones, in War and Peace

tiny.ag/tuvabnig  ·  submitted 1999

Death is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down. The difference between sex and death is that with death you can do it alone and no one is going to make fun of you.

Woody Allen, in Life and Death and Love and Hate

tiny.ag/dxbh08ml  ·  submitted 1997

Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly.

Robert F. Kennedy, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/jwhevbgo  ·  submitted 1997

My theology, briefly, is that the universe was dictated but not signed.

Christopher Morley, in Science and Religion

tiny.ag/yzqij6mr  ·  submitted 1997

I've never met a healthy person who worried much about his health or a good person who worried much about his soul.

Haldane, in Vice and Virtue and Vice and Virtue

tiny.ag/ynhvcg3k  ·  submitted 1997

Oh, my friend, it's not what they take away from you that counts. It's what you do with what you have left.

Hubert Humphrey, in Success and Failure