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Aphorisms Galore! lets you Feed Your Wit by browsing, searching, submitting, and discussing aphorisms and witty sayings by famous and not-so-famous people.
Welcome! The computer thought you might be interested in these aphorisms today, taking into account things like their recent popularities and how new they are to the collection:
tiny.ag/aoh5h6tb · submitted 1999
Everybody wants to save the earth; nobody wants to help Mom do the dishes.
P. J. O'Rourke, All the Trouble in the World, in Altruism and Cynicism and Work and Recreation
tiny.ag/uvpjrb6x · submitted 1997
Desperation is like stealing from the mafia: you stand a good chance of attracting the wrong attention.
tiny.ag/da1k6tun · submitted 1999 by Stephen
All these nervous breakdowns are driving me crazy.
tiny.ag/jvo6jzxe · submitted 1997
Only the mediocre are always at their best.
tiny.ag/s3j4zgfm · submitted 1997
I believe in looking reality straight in the eye and denying it.
tiny.ag/f0cqgbjg · submitted 1997
Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away.
tiny.ag/l4pyn7j8 · submitted 1997
I will answer anything I can with honor, but not about others.
tiny.ag/jwhevbgo · submitted 1997
My theology, briefly, is that the universe was dictated but not signed.
tiny.ag/isf8vo05 · submitted 1997
Delay is preferable to error.
tiny.ag/b3ohbca1 · submitted 1998
He who spends his time reading aphorisms of another to have one of his own, has no time or brains to have any of his own.
tiny.ag/qh2wpltu · submitted 1997
All mankind loves a lover.
tiny.ag/yio6tuyz · submitted 1997
The face of a child can say it all, especially the mouth part of the face.
Jack Handey, Deep Thoughts, in Life and Death
tiny.ag/b5zelloy · submitted 1997
Education is a better safeguard of liberty than a standing army.
tiny.ag/jgjax6rp · submitted 1999
Take a chance and you may lose. Take not a chance and you have lost already.
tiny.ag/y7qkjsrf · submitted 1997
Uncertainty and mystery are energies of life. Don't let them scare you unduly, for they keep boredom at bay and spark creativity.
tiny.ag/kge2ejcq · submitted 1997
It is seldom that liberty of any kind is lost all at once.
tiny.ag/mtktl96r · submitted 1997
Whatever is not nailed down is mine. What I can pry loose is not nailed down.
tiny.ag/kl7xzzq3 · submitted 1997
An eye for an eye would make the whole world blind.
tiny.ag/if7zb5ls · submitted 1997
Bad policies, stupid policies, gutless policies have real consequences.