Success and Failure

Anyone who uses the phrase "easy as taking candy from a baby" has never tried taking candy from a baby.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

Any time you think you have influence, try ordering around someone else's dog.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

Any time things appear to be going better, you have overlooked something.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

Any small object that is accidentally dropped will hide under a larger object.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

Anthony's Law of the Workshop: Any tool, when dropped, will roll into the least accessible corner of the workshop.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

If there is a possibility of several things going wrong, the one that will cause the most damage will be the one to go wrong.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

If you can't learn to do it well, learn to enjoy doing it badly.

Unknown, in Success and Failure and Wisdom and Ignorance

If you do what you've always done, you'll be what you've always been.

Unknown, in Success and Failure and Wisdom and Ignorance

Experience is the worst teacher. It always gives the test first and the instruction afterwards.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

If at first you don't succeed, redefine success.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

If I can be of any help, you're in worse trouble than I thought.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

I'd rather be rich than stupid.

Unknown, in Success and Failure and Wealth and Poverty

If the odds are a million to one against something occurring, chances are 50-50 it will.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

I wish I were what I was when I wanted to be what I am now.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

Hoare's Law of Large Problems: Inside every large problem is a small problem struggling to get out.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

Happiness isn't getting what you want, it's wanting what you've got.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

God wisely designed the human body so that we can neither pat our own backs nor kick ourselves too easily.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

Finagle's Fourth Law: Once a job is fouled up, anything done to improve it only makes it worse.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

Ducharm's Axiom: If you view your problem closely enough you will recognize yourself as part of the problem.

Unknown, in Life and Death and Success and Failure