Altruism and Cynicism

Egotism is the anesthetic given by a kindly nature to relieve the pain of being a damned fool.

Bellamy Brooks, in Altruism and Cynicism

I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants.

A. Whitney Brown, in Altruism and Cynicism

The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans is suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they're okay, then it's you.

Rita Mae Brown, in Altruism and Cynicism

All government -- indeed, every human benefit and enjoyment, every virtue and every prudent act -- is founded on compromise and barter.

Edmund Burke, in Altruism and Cynicism

I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally.

W. C. Fields, in Altruism and Cynicism

Never give a sucker an even break and never smarten up a chump.

W. C. Fields, in Altruism and Cynicism

Start every day off with a smile and get it over with.

W. C. Fields, in Altruism and Cynicism

By means of shrewd lies, unremittingly repeated, it is possible to make people believe that heaven is hell -- and hell heaven. The greater the lie, the more readily it will be believed.

Adolf Hitler, Mein Kampf, in Altruism and Cynicism

I use emotion for the many and reserve reason for the few.

Adolf Hitler, in Altruism and Cynicism

The victor will never be asked if he told the truth.

Adolf Hitler, in Altruism and Cynicism

Egoist: A person of low taste, more interested in themselves than in me.

Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Altruism and Cynicism

Eulogy: Praise of a person who has either the advantages of wealth and power, or the consideration to be dead.

Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Altruism and Cynicism

Politeness: The most acceptable hypocrisy.

Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Altruism and Cynicism

The covers of this book are too far apart.

Ambrose Bierce, in Altruism and Cynicism

No good deed goes unpunished.

Clare Boothe Luce, in Altruism and Cynicism

Grub first, then ethics.

Bertolt Brecht, in Altruism and Cynicism

The simplest act of surrealism is to walk out into the street, gun in hand, and shoot at random.

André Breton, in Altruism and Cynicism

I either want less corruption, or more chance to participate in it.

Ashleigh Brilliant, Brilliant Thoughts (copyright info: www.ashleighbrilliant.com), in Altruism and Cynicism and Law and Politics

Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity.

Robert J. Hanlon, in Altruism and Cynicism and Vice and Virtue

One nice thing about egotists is that they don't talk about other people.

Lucille S. Harper, in Altruism and Cynicism