Aphorisms Galore!

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Aphorisms Galore! lets you Feed Your Wit by browsing, searching, submitting, discussing, and rating aphorisms and witty sayings by famous and not-so-famous people.

Welcome! The computer thought you might be interested in these aphorisms today, taking into account things like their recent popularities, their ratings, and how new they are to the collection:

Comment#  ·   Fair (388 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

If you want a high performance woman, I can go from zero to bitch in less than 2.1 seconds.

Krystal Ann Kraus, in Men and Women

Comment#  ·   Fair (677 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Whenever anyone says anything he is indulging in theories.

Alfred Korzybski, in Science and Religion and Wisdom and Ignorance

Comment#  ·   Fair (334 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

To be prepared against surprise is to be trained. To be prepared for surprise is to be educated.

James Carse, in Life and Death

Comment#  ·   Fair (1119 ratings)  ·  submitted 1999 by Brian J. Dent

Too much of a good thing is just that.

Brian J. Dent, in Vice and Virtue

Comment#  ·   Fair (445 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

You've got to be very careful if you don't know where you're going, because you might not get there.

Yogi Berra, in Success and Failure

Comment#  ·   Fair (146 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

I improve on misquotation.

Cary Grant, in Wisdom and Ignorance

Comment#  ·   Fair (313 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Good ideas are a dime a dozen, bad ones are free.

Doug Horton, in Success and Failure

Comment#  ·   Fair (810 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

The Puritans hated bear-baiting, not because it gave pain to the bear, but because it gave pleasure to the spectators.

Thomas Macaulay, History of England, I, in Vice and Virtue

History of England (paperback)

Comment#  ·   Fair (576 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

The opposite of a profound truth may well be another profound truth.

Niels Bohr, in Science and Religion

Comment#  ·   Fair (550 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

I don't know with what weapons World War III will be fought, but World War IV will be fought with sticks and stones.

Albert Einstein, in War and Peace

Comment#  ·   Fair (1050 ratings)  ·  submitted 1999 by Michael A. Loduha

When skunks duel, wind direction is everything.

Michael A. Loduha, (on environmental factors in legal cases vs. the attorneys' skills; from a lecture series), in Law and Politics

Comment#  ·   Fair (1237 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Egoist: A person of low taste, more interested in themselves than in me.

Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Altruism and Cynicism

The Devil's Dictionary (paperback)

Comment#  ·   Fair (494 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

You can get more of what you want with a kind word and a gun than you can with just a kind word.

Al Capone, in War and Peace

Comment#  ·   Fair (1071 ratings)  ·  submitted 1999

The secret of success is constancy to purpose.

Benjamin Disraeli, in Success and Failure

Comment#  ·   Fair (1099 ratings)  ·  submitted 1998  · 

Never try to out-stubborn a cat.

Robert A. Heinlein, The Notebooks of Lazarus Long, in Success and Failure

The Notebooks of Lazarus Long (paperback)

Comment#  ·   Fair (368 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997  · 

We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up.

Phyllis Diller, in Life and Death

Comment#  ·   Fair (516 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

We should take care not to make the intellect our god; it has, of course, powerful muscles, but no personality.

Albert Einstein, in Science and Religion

Comment#  ·   Fair (820 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

A woman is only a woman, but a good cigar is a smoke.

Rudyard Kipling, in Men and Women and Vice and Virtue

Comment#  ·   Fair (507 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Women who seek to be equal with men lack ambition.

Timothy Leary, in Men and Women

Comment#  ·   Fair (278 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

The right to be heard does not automatically include the right to be taken seriously.

Hubert H. Humphrey, in Law and Politics

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