Aphorisms Galore!

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Aphorisms Galore! lets you Feed Your Wit by browsing, searching, submitting, discussing, and rating aphorisms and witty sayings by famous and not-so-famous people.

Welcome! The computer thought you might be interested in these aphorisms today, taking into account things like their recent popularities, their ratings, and how new they are to the collection:

Comment#  ·   Fair (1009 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997  · 

When angry, count to ten before you speak; when very angry, a hundred.

Thomas Jefferson, Writings, in Wisdom and Ignorance

Comment#  ·   Fair (239 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

If you have a bowl of apples and you eat the best ones first, then you have only the best ones left.

Shelly Horton, in Success and Failure

Comment#  ·   Fair (3330 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Kindness is the beginning of cruelty.

Frank Herbert, Dune, in Altruism and Cynicism

Dune (paperback)

Comment#  ·   Fair (257 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Only the mediocre are always at their best.

Jean Giraudoux, in Success and Failure

Comment#  ·   Fair (563 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

If I don't know I don't know, I think I know. If I don't know I know, I think I don't know.

R. D. Laing, in Wisdom and Ignorance

Comment#  ·   Fair (533 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

As far as the laws of mathematics refer to reality, they are not certain, and as far as they are certain, they do not refer to reality.

Albert Einstein, in Science and Religion

Comment#  ·   Fair (558 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997  · 

The end of the human race will be that it will eventually die of civilization.

Ralph Waldo Emerson, in War and Peace

Comment#  ·   Fair (935 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997  · 

Life is like a sewer -- what you get out of it depends on what you put into it.

Tom Lehrer, (from the album An Evening Wasted), in Life and Death

An Evening Wasted (audio CD)

Comment#  ·   Fair (355 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

There's nothing so useless as doing efficiently that which should not be done at all.

Peter F. Drucker, in Success and Failure

Comment#  ·   Fair (447 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Middle age is youth without levity. And old age without decay.

Daniel Defoe, in Life and Death

Comment#  ·   Fair (1249 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Life is the childhood of our immortality.

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, in Life and Death

Comment#  ·   Fair (723 ratings)  ·  submitted 1999 by Stephen

All these nervous breakdowns are driving me crazy.

Lee Hawkins, in Health and Disease

Comment#  ·   Fair (493 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Love is the answer. But while you're waiting for the answer, sex brings up some pretty good questions.

Woody Allen, in Love and Hate

Comment#  ·   Fair (1115 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Riot: A popular entertainment given to the military by innocent bystanders.

Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in War and Peace

The Devil's Dictionary (paperback)

Comment#  ·   Fair (255 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Democracy does not guarantee equality of conditions -- it only guarantees equality of opportunity.

Irving Kristol, in Law and Politics

Comment#  ·   Fair (370 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997  · 

I am become death, shatterer of worlds.

Robert J. Oppenheimer, (quoting the Bhagavadgita after witnessing the first nuclear explosion), in War and Peace

Comment#  ·   Fair (384 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

So of cheerfulness, or a good temper, the more it is spent, the more it remains.

Ralph Waldo Emerson, in Happiness and Misery

Comment#  ·   Fair (420 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Born a saint, die a sinner -- born a sinner, die a saint.

Doug Horton, in Vice and Virtue

Comment#  ·   Fair (424 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

A pint of sweat saves a gallon of blood.

George Patton, in War and Peace and Work and Recreation

Comment#  ·   Fair (576 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

The opposite of a profound truth may well be another profound truth.

Niels Bohr, in Science and Religion

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