Unknown
Aphorisms Attributed to This Aphorist
21–40 (422)
tiny.ag/yjcobkfn · submitted 1997
No one gets too old to learn a new way of being stupid.
tiny.ag/6bpzcbnv · submitted 1997
Ninety-Ninety Rule of Project Schedules: The first ninety percent of the task takes ninety percent of the time, and the last ten percent takes the other ninety percent.
tiny.ag/nqmdzsyl · submitted 1997
Never put off till tomorrow what you can avoid all together.
tiny.ag/zoq7mjnx · submitted 1997
Never make anything simple and efficient when a way can be found to make it complex and wonderful.
tiny.ag/pxfadpln · submitted 1997
Never give advice -- a wise man won't need it, a fool won't heed it.
tiny.ag/scie9t27 · submitted 1997
Never deprive someone of hope -- it may be all they have.
tiny.ag/ncguuawn · submitted 1997
Never ask the barber if you need a haircut.
tiny.ag/as0knvco · submitted 1997
Never argue with a fool. Someone watching may not be able to tell the difference.
tiny.ag/njl5gsre · submitted 1997
Live to learn... forget... and learn again.
tiny.ag/tmqynfg7 · submitted 1997
It is not the horse that draws the cart, but the oats.
Unknown, (Russian proverb), in Work and Recreation
tiny.ag/jcmdoh1n · submitted 1998 by Anja Klein
Live each day as if it were the last day of your life, because so far, it is.
tiny.ag/ckyj1g65 · submitted 1997
Life's a bitch, and then she has puppies.
Unknown, in Life and Death and Success and Failure
tiny.ag/sbtlzeuy · submitted 1997
Life is like a raffle -- you must be present to win.
tiny.ag/pe3wjdh9 · submitted 1997
Jenkinson's Law: It won't work.
tiny.ag/6vqkumld · submitted 1997
Just because your doctor has a name for your condition doesn't mean he knows what it is.
tiny.ag/0raepug8 · submitted 1997
Jones' Law: The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on.
tiny.ag/vykjqus7 · submitted 1997
Join the Army: travel to exotic distant lands, meet exciting, unusual people and kill them.
Unknown, in War and Peace
tiny.ag/xnqzybth · submitted 1997
Johnson's First Law: When any mechanical contrivance fails, it will do so at the most inconvenient possible time.
tiny.ag/kgx6jecr · submitted 1997
Jesus died for your sins. Make it worth his time.
tiny.ag/ulyprgno · submitted 1997
It takes 8,460 bolts to assemble an automobile, and one nut to scatter it all over the road.
Unknown, (bumper sticker), in Life and Death
21–40 (422)