Unknown

Always remember your weapons system was made by the lowest bidder

Unknown, in War and Peace

Give a man a fish and he'll ask for a lemon. Teach a man to fish and he'll leave work early on Friday.

Unknown, in Work and Recreation

Try to get all of your posthumous medals in advance.

Unknown, in Life and Death and Success and Failure

Under the most rigorously controlled conditions of pressure, temperature, volume, humidity, and other variables, the organism will do as it damn well pleases.

Unknown, in Science and Religion

Use soft words and hard arguments.

Unknown, in Success and Failure and Wisdom and Ignorance

Voters are people who have the God-given right to decide who will waste their money for them.

Unknown, (from Politicians and Other Scoundrels by Ferdinand Lundberg), in Law and Politics

War is menstruation envy.

Unknown, in War and Peace

Waste not fresh tears over old griefs.

Unknown, in Happiness and Misery

Wasting time is an important part of living.

Unknown, in Work and Recreation

Watch for big problems; they disguise big opportunities.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

We should forgive our enemies, but only after they've been taken out and shot.

Unknown, in Altruism and Cynicism

Weiler's Law: Nothing is impossible for the man who doesn't have to do it himself.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

Well-timed silence hath more eloquence than speech.

Unknown, in Wisdom and Ignorance

Westheimer's Discovery: A couple of months in the laboratory can frequently save a couple of hours in the library.

Unknown, in Work and Recreation

Wethern's Law: Assumption is the mother of all screw-ups.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

When a female has tears in her eyes the one who cannot see is the male.

Unknown, in Men and Women

When a man's wife learns to understand him, she usually stops listening to him.

Unknown, in Men and Women

When an ordinary man attains knowledge, he is a sage; when a sage attains knowledge, he is an ordinary man.

Unknown, (Zen saying), in Wisdom and Ignorance

When elephants fight, only the grass gets hurt.

Unknown, in War and Peace

When falling in love, some lose their head, others lose their heart.

Unknown, in Love and Hate