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Love and Hate

114 aphorisms  ·  16 comments

Aphorisms in This Category

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Comment#  ·   Fair (890 ratings)  ·  submitted 1999  · 

Death is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down. The difference between sex and death is that with death you can do it alone and no one is going to make fun of you.

Woody Allen, in Life and Death and Love and Hate

Comment#  ·   Fair (493 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Love is the answer. But while you're waiting for the answer, sex brings up some pretty good questions.

Woody Allen, in Love and Hate

Comment#  ·   Fair (279 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Marriage is the death of hope.

Woody Allen, in Love and Hate

Comment#  ·   Fair (545 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Sex without love is an empty gesture. But as empty gestures go, it is one of the best.

Woody Allen, Love and Death, in Love and Hate

Love and Death

Comment#  ·   Fair (680 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Happiness: An agreeable sensation arising from contemplating the misery of another.

Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Love and Hate and Success and Failure

The Devil's Dictionary (paperback)

Comment#  ·   Fair (741 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Hatred: A sentiment appropriate to the occasion of another's superiority.

Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Love and Hate and Success and Failure

The Devil's Dictionary (paperback)

Comment#  ·   Fair (210 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Helpmate: A wife, or bitter half.

Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Love and Hate

Comment#  ·   Fair (382 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Incompatibility: In matrimony a similarity of tastes, particularly the taste for domination.

Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Love and Hate

Comment#  ·   Fair (741 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Love: A temporary insanity cureable either by marriage or by removal of the influences under which he incurred the disorder. It is sometimes fatal, but more frequently to the physician than the patient.

Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Love and Hate

The Devil's Dictionary (paperback)

Comment#  ·   Fair (169 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Is that a gun in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?

Mae West, in Love and Hate

Comment#  ·   Fair (178 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution yet.

Mae West, in Love and Hate

Comment#  ·   Fair (480 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same.

Oscar Wilde, in Love and Hate

Comment#  ·   Fair (489 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.

Oscar Wilde, in Love and Hate

Comment#  ·   Fair (132 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

People who are sensible about love are incapable of it.

Douglas Yates, in Love and Hate

Comment#  ·   Fair (313 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

A man needs a mistress, just to break the monogamy.

Unknown, in Love and Hate and Men and Women

Comment#  ·   Fair (95 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

As to marriage or celibacy, let a man take the course he will. He will be sure to repent.

Socrates, in Love and Hate

Comment#  ·   Fair (97 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997  · 

My advice to you is to get married. If you find a good wife, you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a philosopher.

Socrates, in Love and Hate

Comment#  ·   Fair (82 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

No distance of place or lapse of time can lessen the friendship of those who are thoroughly persuaded of each other's worth.

Robert Southey, in Love and Hate

Comment#  ·   Fair (1026 ratings)  ·  submitted 1998

If only bad habits could be broken as easily as hearts!

Christopher Spranger, The Effort to Fall, in Love and Hate and Vice and Virtue

The Effort to Fall (paperback)

Comment#  ·   Fair (71 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

The essence of true friendship is to make allowances for another's little lapses.

David Storey, in Love and Hate

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