Aphorisms Galore!

Life and Death

196 aphorisms  ·  11 comments

Aphorisms in This Category

tiny.ag/mefigsvw  ·  submitted 1997

Living your life is a task so difficult, it has never been attempted before.

Unknown, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/ngzfgtnp  ·  submitted 1997

Man did not weave the web of life, he is merely a strand in it. Whatever he does to the web, he does to himself.

Unknown, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/hni90jff  ·  submitted 1997

Not everyone born in a stable thinks himself a horse.

Unknown, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/8dojvkdg  ·  submitted 1997

Too much credit is given to the end result. The true lesson is in the struggle that takes place between the dream and reality. That struggle is a thing called life!

Garth Brooks, in Life and Death and Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/l3yahg9k  ·  submitted 1997

The Devil's Dictionary (paperback)

Prescription: A physician's guess at what will best prolong the situation with least harm to the patient.

Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in Health and Disease and Life and Death

tiny.ag/9xelzoym  ·  submitted 1997

Life is a tragedy for those who feel, and a comedy for those who think, and a docudrama with ugly actors for those who film docudramas.

Dr. Squid, in Altruism and Cynicism and Life and Death

tiny.ag/p2zj718l  ·  submitted 1997

The only absolute knowledge worth attaining is that your life is meaningless. -- My life? Well now, that's another story...

Dr. Squid, in Altruism and Cynicism and Life and Death

tiny.ag/f70nm4cm  ·  submitted 1999

All I desire for my own burial is not to be buried alive.

The Earl of Chesterfield, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/90upthng  ·  submitted 1999

If you're here, you're alive.

Unknown, in Life and Death and Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/jlbzkcea  ·  submitted 1997

Insisting on perfect safety is for people who don't have the balls to live in the real world.

Unknown, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/skc4wmie  ·  submitted 1997

It doesn't take all kinds -- we just have all kinds.

Unknown, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/4asrjxv3  ·  submitted 1997

I'm prepared for all emergencies but totally unprepared for everyday life.

Unknown, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/ilv3oim9  ·  submitted 1997

Life is an unbroken succession of false situations.

Thornton Wilder, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/9djxhqx6  ·  submitted 1997

If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.

Earl Wilson, in Altruism and Cynicism and Life and Death

tiny.ag/hwk0yobb  ·  submitted 1997

All I ask of life is a constant and exaggerated sense of my own importance.

Unknown, in Life and Death and Success and Failure

tiny.ag/lewynsak  ·  submitted 1997

Always remember that you are unique. Just like everyone else.

Unknown, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/uys04zyz  ·  submitted 1997

Be an optimist -- at least until they start moving animals in pairs to Cape Kennedy.

Unknown, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/bleirdyt  ·  submitted 1997

Caution: breathing may be hazardous to your health.

Unknown, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/ygktzxcq  ·  submitted 1997

Children are natural mimics who act like their parents despite every effort to teach them good manners.

Unknown, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/zdywajhx  ·  submitted 1997

Children in the front seat cause accidents, accidents in the back seat cause children.

Unknown, in Life and Death