Life and Death

Death is God's way of telling you not to be such a wise guy.

Unknown, in Life and Death

Death is nature's way of recycling human beings.

Unknown, in Life and Death

Death is nature's way of telling you to slow down.

Unknown, in Life and Death and Work and Recreation

Do not regret growing older. It is a privilege denied to many.

Unknown, in Life and Death

Don't die until you're dead.

Unknown, in Life and Death

Don't worry over what other people are thinking about you. They're too busy worrying over what you are thinking about them.

Unknown, in Life and Death

Ducharm's Axiom: If you view your problem closely enough you will recognize yourself as part of the problem.

Unknown, in Life and Death and Success and Failure

Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.

Unknown, in Life and Death

Eat a live toad in the morning and nothing worse will happen to you for the rest of the day.

Unknown, in Life and Death

Every time a baby is born, so is a grandmother.

Unknown, in Life and Death

Everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die.

Unknown, in Life and Death

Fairy tales: Horror stories for children to get them used to reality.

Unknown, in Life and Death

For those who fight for it, life has a flavor the sheltered will never know.

Unknown, in Happiness and Misery and Life and Death

Death is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down. The difference between sex and death is that with death you can do it alone and no one is going to make fun of you.

Woody Allen, in Life and Death and Love and Hate

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve immortality by living forever.

Woody Allen, in Life and Death

Attack life, it's going to kill you anyway.

Steven Coallier, in Life and Death

We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up.

Phyllis Diller, in Life and Death

Goodbye. I am leaving because I am bored.

George Saunders, (dying words), in Life and Death

Life is a rollercoaster. Try to eat a light lunch.

David A. Schmaltz, in Life and Death

Life is a tale told by an idiot -- full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.

William Shakespeare, Macbeth, in Life and Death