Aphorisms Galore!

Aphorism of the Day

This is an archive of every Aphorim of the Day since 2012.

Every single day, a very sophisticated computer running state of the art software carefully picks an aphorism from the collection and sends it out to all the nice people who have subscribed to the Aphorism of the Day. If you want to be one of these nice people, create a user profile and start a subscription.

2025-02-01

tiny.ag/v128alif  ·  submitted 1997

In the country of the blind, the one-eyed man is king... and the one-eyed man with the high heels and the feather boa is queen.

Dr. Squid, in Altruism and Cynicism

2025-01-31

tiny.ag/vyciqzog  ·  submitted 1997

We live in an age when pizza gets to your home before the police.

Jeff Marder, in Law and Politics

2025-01-30

tiny.ag/8v5ai4cz  ·  submitted 1997

These days, the wages of sin depend on what kind of deal you make with the devil.

Kara Vichko, in Vice and Virtue

2025-01-29

tiny.ag/8vqphwcy  ·  submitted 1998 by Mark van Essen

Mankind terminated, man what a break.

Mark van Essen, (from a lyric written for Bruce Springsteen), in Life and Death

2025-01-28

tiny.ag/c9ykbift  ·  submitted 1997

When a thing has been said, and said well, have no scruple. Take it and copy it.

Anatole France, in Wisdom and Ignorance

2025-01-27

tiny.ag/vjl9ro7i  ·  submitted 1997

Self-respect permeates every aspect of your life.

Joe Clark, in Success and Failure

2025-01-26

tiny.ag/bku8tth7  ·  submitted 1997

If we are the only intelligent life in the universe, at least there's a finite number of idiots.

Steven Coallier, in Wisdom and Ignorance

2025-01-25

tiny.ag/2drhezti  ·  submitted 1997

If there is a gun hanging on the wall in the first act, it must fire in the last.

Anton Chekhov, (advice to a novice playwright), in Art and Literature

2025-01-24

tiny.ag/gu6tloek  ·  submitted 1997

An honest politician is one who, when he is bought, will stay bought.

Simon Cameron, in Altruism and Cynicism and Law and Politics

2025-01-23

tiny.ag/g6oi3hzo  ·  submitted 1997

We trained hard, but it seemed that everytime we were beginning to form up into teams, we would be reorganized. I was to learn later in life that we tend to meet any new situation by reorganizing; and a wonderful method it can be for creating the illusion of progress while producing confusion, inefficiency and demoralization.

Unknown, (sometimes incorrectly attributed to Petronius Arbiter), in Work and Recreation