Unknown

Give a man a fish and he'll ask for a lemon. Teach a man to fish and he'll leave work early on Friday.

Unknown, in Work and Recreation

Always remember your weapons system was made by the lowest bidder

Unknown, in War and Peace

You're a genius if you fly a kite during a thunderstorm, and discover that lightning is electricity -- but you're an idiot if you fly a kite during a thunderstorm, and discover that lightning can kill you.

Unknown, (from Mad Magazine), in Success and Failure

You should emulate your heroes, but don't carry it too far. Especially if they are dead.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

You may only have two of the three choices: (1) Enjoy your job. (2)Work within the law. (3)Make lots of money.

Unknown, in Work and Recreation

You draw nothing out of the bank of life except what you deposit in it.

Unknown, in Life and Death

You cannot produce a baby in one month by impregnating nine women.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

The sum of the intelligence on the planet is a constant; the population is growing.

Unknown, in Science and Religion

To get something done, a committee should consist of no more than three men, two of them absent.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

The surest sign that a man is in love is when he divorces his wife.

Unknown, in Love and Hate

The surest way of having something done is to forbid your kids to do it.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

The tallest blade of grass is the first to be cut by the scythe.

Unknown, (Russian proverb), in Success and Failure

The trouble with doing something right the first time is that nobody appreciates how difficult it was.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

The way to make a small fortune in the commodities market is to start with a large fortune.

Unknown, in Wealth and Poverty

The world is governed more by appearance than realities, so it is fully as necessary to seem to know something as it is to know it.

Unknown, in Wisdom and Ignorance

Theft from a single author is plagiarism. Theft from two is comparative study. Theft from three or more is research.

Unknown, in Science and Religion and Work and Recreation

There are a lot of ways to become a failure, but never taking a chance is the most successful.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

There are no errors in this book, except this one.

Unknown, in Science and Religion

There are people who make things happen, those who watch what happens, and those who wonder what happened.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

To err is human, to blame the next guy even more so.

Unknown, in Altruism and Cynicism