Aphorisms Galore!

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Aphorisms Galore! lets you Feed Your Wit by browsing, searching, submitting, discussing, and rating aphorisms and witty sayings by famous and not-so-famous people.

Welcome! The computer thought you might be interested in these aphorisms today, taking into account things like their recent popularities, their ratings, and how new they are to the collection:

tiny.ag/odq1svy5  ·   Fair (368 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up.

Phyllis Diller, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/nvdb2cfz  ·   Fair (403 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Burning desire is the eternal flame.

Doug Horton, in Love and Hate

tiny.ag/6y7nwgkt  ·   Fair (1119 ratings)  ·  submitted 1999 by Brian J. Dent

Too much of a good thing is just that.

Brian J. Dent, in Vice and Virtue

tiny.ag/8dgit6e3  ·   Fair (1198 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Imagination, not invention, is the supreme master of art as of life.

Joseph Conrad, in Art and Literature

tiny.ag/hjlqxeds  ·   Fair (337 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

In politics, merit is rewarded by the possessor being raised, like a target, to a position to be fired at.

Christian Nevell Bovee, (from Politicians and Other Scoundrels by Ferdinand Lundberg), in Law and Politics

tiny.ag/oqpuijzx  ·   Fair (625 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Hell, there are no rules here -- we're trying to accomplish something.

Thomas Alva Edison, in Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/wtukmszr  ·   Fair (1186 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

A bank is a place where they lend you an umbrella in fair weather and ask for it back when it begins to rain.

Robert Frost, in Wealth and Poverty

tiny.ag/t9m3smqg  ·   Fair (1410 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Women make love for love, men make love for lust.

Derrick Harge, in Love and Hate and Men and Women

tiny.ag/mnrh4p2b  ·   Fair (608 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Always forgive your enemies, but never forget their names.

John F. Kennedy, in Altruism and Cynicism and Vice and Virtue

tiny.ag/9qotdgih  ·   Fair (684 ratings)  ·  submitted 1999

Jesus may love you, but I think you're garbage wrapped in skin.

Doug Kenney, in Love and Hate

tiny.ag/yuezt1iy  ·   Fair (377 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

A painting in a museum probably hears more foolish remarks than anything else in the world.

Edmond Jules Goncourt, in Art and Literature

tiny.ag/mb7skahf  ·   Fair (276 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

It is people who live by the rules that are always hoping to get them changed.

Robert Harbison, in Law and Politics

tiny.ag/tuvabnig  ·   Fair (890 ratings)  ·  submitted 1999

Death is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down. The difference between sex and death is that with death you can do it alone and no one is going to make fun of you.

Woody Allen, in Life and Death and Love and Hate

tiny.ag/dozch5ts  ·   Fair (611 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Most of life is choices, and the rest is pure dumb luck.

Marian Erickson, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/i5ba47dl  ·   Fair (478 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

It gets late early out there.

Yogi Berra, (on Yankee Stadium in the fall), in Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/04lm8ot1  ·   Fair (290 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Passionate hatred can give meaning and purpose to an empty life.

Eric Hoffer, in Love and Hate

tiny.ag/0adqbc8f  ·   Fair (518 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Everything should be made as simple as possible, but not simpler.

Albert Einstein, in Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/950guyxd  ·   Fair (479 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

I like pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals.

Winston Churchill, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/hudckmys  ·   Fair (572 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

If time be of all things most precious, wasting time must be the greatest prodigality, since lost time is never found again; and what we call time enough always proves little enough.

Benjamin Franklin, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/hyedkhd2  ·   Fair (330 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

It is the province of knowledge to speak, and it is the privilege of wisdom to listen.

Oliver Wendell Holmes, in Wisdom and Ignorance