Aphorisms Galore!

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Aphorisms Galore! lets you Feed Your Wit by browsing, searching, submitting, and discussing aphorisms and witty sayings by famous and not-so-famous people.

Welcome! The computer thought you might be interested in these aphorisms today, taking into account things like their recent popularities and how new they are to the collection:

tiny.ag/4xolnjrp  ·  submitted 1997

Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds.

Albert Einstein, in Science and Religion and Success and Failure

tiny.ag/ieyckbys  ·  submitted 1997

A blow with a word strikes deeper than a blow with a sword.

Robert Burton, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/9bumiall  ·  submitted 1997

There's nothing so useless as doing efficiently that which should not be done at all.

Peter F. Drucker, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/uoqbw63r  ·  submitted 1997

It is not necessary to understand things in order to argue about them.

Pierre Augustin Caron de Beaumarchais, in Science and Religion

tiny.ag/iht7l65u  ·  submitted 1997

Egotism is the anesthetic given by a kindly nature to relieve the pain of being a damned fool.

Bellamy Brooks, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/uvpjrb6x  ·  submitted 1997

Desperation is like stealing from the mafia: you stand a good chance of attracting the wrong attention.

Doug Horton, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/g9nfhw0y  ·  submitted 1997

Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal.

Albert Camus, in Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/9kdycunx  ·  submitted 1997

By working faithfully eight hours a day, you may eventually get to be boss and work twelve.

Robert Frost, in Success and Failure and Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/bmdpgrs0  ·  submitted 1997

Let's have some new clichés.

Samuel Goldwyn, in Art and Literature

tiny.ag/iqolobqc  ·  submitted 1997

In order to preserve your self-respect, it is sometimes necessary to lie and cheat.

Robert Byrne, in Vice and Virtue

tiny.ag/kl7xzzq3  ·  submitted 1997

An eye for an eye would make the whole world blind.

Mahatma Gandhi, in Vice and Virtue

tiny.ag/6b9j37a4  ·  submitted 1997

Wise men don't need advice; fools don't take it.

Benjamin Franklin, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/8bpf0foj  ·  submitted 1997

I am become death, shatterer of worlds.

Robert J. Oppenheimer, (quoting the Bhagavadgita after witnessing the first nuclear explosion), in War and Peace

tiny.ag/lctsfa7d  ·  submitted 1997

Politics is like a race horse. A good jockey must know how to fall with the least possible damage.

Edouard Herriot, (from Politicians and Other Scoundrels by Ferdinand Lundberg), in Law and Politics

tiny.ag/dlefcimh  ·  submitted 1997

Comedy is tragedy plus time.

Carol Burnett, in Happiness and Misery

tiny.ag/slwohzjt  ·  submitted 1997

It's kinda fun to do the impossible.

Walt Disney, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/vfmz7cvr  ·  submitted 1997

If you want a high performance woman, I can go from zero to bitch in less than 2.1 seconds.

Krystal Ann Kraus, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/odq1svy5  ·  submitted 1997

We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up.

Phyllis Diller, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/axybc0uz  ·  submitted 1997

With love and patience, nothing is impossible.

Daisaku Ikeda, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/tldrjftc  ·  submitted 1997

The Devil's Dictionary (paperback)

Riot: A popular entertainment given to the military by innocent bystanders.

Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in War and Peace