Aphorisms Galore!

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Aphorisms Galore! lets you Feed Your Wit by browsing, searching, submitting, discussing, and rating aphorisms and witty sayings by famous and not-so-famous people.

Welcome! The computer thought you might be interested in these aphorisms today, taking into account things like their recent popularities, their ratings, and how new they are to the collection:

tiny.ag/nvfl7j9k  ·   Fair (522 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Don't worry about people stealing your ideas. If your ideas are any good, you'll have to ram them down people's throats.

Howard Aiken, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/tuvabnig  ·   Fair (890 ratings)  ·  submitted 1999

Death is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down. The difference between sex and death is that with death you can do it alone and no one is going to make fun of you.

Woody Allen, in Life and Death and Love and Hate

tiny.ag/m6lj8yot  ·   Fair (255 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Democracy does not guarantee equality of conditions -- it only guarantees equality of opportunity.

Irving Kristol, in Law and Politics

tiny.ag/ucas5skv  ·   Fair (1249 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Life is the childhood of our immortality.

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/vsuzg5uw  ·   Fair (542 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Being kissed by a man who didn't wax his moustache was like eating an egg without salt.

Rudyard Kipling, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/9qotdgih  ·   Fair (684 ratings)  ·  submitted 1999

Jesus may love you, but I think you're garbage wrapped in skin.

Doug Kenney, in Love and Hate

tiny.ag/br8cx6zt  ·   Fair (628 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

I have learned to use the word "impossible" with the greatest caution.

Werner von Braun, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/soebrnq6  ·   Fair (286 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Never offend people with style when you can offend them with substance.

Sam Brown, (Washington Post, 1977), in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/slwohzjt  ·   Fair (549 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

It's kinda fun to do the impossible.

Walt Disney, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/da1k6tun  ·   Fair (723 ratings)  ·  submitted 1999 by Stephen

All these nervous breakdowns are driving me crazy.

Lee Hawkins, in Health and Disease

tiny.ag/7graufwl  ·   Fair (1408 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Whatever you do will be insignificant, but it is very important that you do it.

Mahatma Gandhi, in Law and Politics and Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/kygnp58l  ·   Fair (334 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

To be prepared against surprise is to be trained. To be prepared for surprise is to be educated.

James Carse, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/6b9j37a4  ·   Fair (528 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Wise men don't need advice; fools don't take it.

Benjamin Franklin, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/0adqbc8f  ·   Fair (518 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Everything should be made as simple as possible, but not simpler.

Albert Einstein, in Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/8vmi9s0a  ·   Fair (492 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

I call Christianity the one great curse, the one great intrinsic depravity, the one great instinct for revenge for which no expedient is sufficiently poisonous, secret, subterranean, petty -- I call it the one mortal blemish of mankind.

Friedrich Nietzsche, in Science and Religion

tiny.ag/yqo9cx7w  ·   Fair (313 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Good ideas are a dime a dozen, bad ones are free.

Doug Horton, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/mglnajv0  ·   Fair (1274 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

It is impossible to love and be wise.

Francis Bacon, in Love and Hate

tiny.ag/e87wmjqg  ·   Fair (558 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

The end of the human race will be that it will eventually die of civilization.

Ralph Waldo Emerson, in War and Peace

tiny.ag/gvohc8br  ·   Fair (3332 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

In nature, there are neither rewards nor punishments -- there are consequences.

Robert G. Ingersoll, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/jvo6jzxe  ·   Fair (257 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Only the mediocre are always at their best.

Jean Giraudoux, in Success and Failure