Aphorisms Galore!

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Aphorisms Galore! lets you Feed Your Wit by browsing, searching, submitting, and discussing aphorisms and witty sayings by famous and not-so-famous people.

Welcome! The computer thought you might be interested in these aphorisms today, taking into account things like their recent popularities and how new they are to the collection:

tiny.ag/w4pngtxm  ·  submitted 1999 by Ron Leemans

Leemans' Law: Junk expands to fill the space allotted.

Ron Leemans, in Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/vmqykh2c  ·  submitted 1997

Catch-22 (paperback)

The Lord gave us farmers two strong hands so we could grab as much as we could with both of them.

Joseph Heller, Catch-22, in Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/7graufwl  ·  submitted 1997

Whatever you do will be insignificant, but it is very important that you do it.

Mahatma Gandhi, in Law and Politics and Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/mqbuthzj  ·  submitted 1997 by Brad Johnson

I'd rather die while I'm living than live while I'm dead.

Jimmy Buffett, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/xachd7wx  ·  submitted 1997

Whenever anyone says anything he is indulging in theories.

Alfred Korzybski, in Science and Religion and Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/qn3ryz0y  ·  submitted 1998

Freedom is not the right to live as we please, but the right to find how we ought to live in order to fulfill our potential.

Ralph Waldo Emerson, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/uvpjrb6x  ·  submitted 1997

Desperation is like stealing from the mafia: you stand a good chance of attracting the wrong attention.

Doug Horton, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/hoklinq4  ·  submitted 1997

Middle age is youth without levity. And old age without decay.

Daniel Defoe, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/8d5pktgj  ·  submitted 1997

A continuing flow of paper is sufficient to continue the flow of paper.

Dyer, Dyer's Law, in Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/oqpuijzx  ·  submitted 1997

Hell, there are no rules here -- we're trying to accomplish something.

Thomas Alva Edison, in Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/6qzazlkw  ·  submitted 1997

Silence is argument carried out by other means.

Ernesto "Che" Guevara, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/npf5ywfi  ·  submitted 1997

He that would perfect his work must first sharpen his tools.

Confucius, in Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/raffprlg  ·  submitted 1997

The shepherd drives the wolf from the sheep's throat, for which the sheep thanks the shepherd as his liberator, while the wolf denounces him for the same act as the destroyer of liberty.

Abraham Lincoln, in Law and Politics

tiny.ag/tuvabnig  ·  submitted 1999

Death is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down. The difference between sex and death is that with death you can do it alone and no one is going to make fun of you.

Woody Allen, in Life and Death and Love and Hate

tiny.ag/poggndv0  ·  submitted 1997

Be polite to all, but intimate with few.

Thomas Jefferson, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/iobj0muk  ·  submitted 1997

Cynicism is an unpleasant way of saying the truth.

Lillian Hellman, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/m6lj8yot  ·  submitted 1997

Democracy does not guarantee equality of conditions -- it only guarantees equality of opportunity.

Irving Kristol, in Law and Politics

tiny.ag/pmqy9n03  ·  submitted 1997

It's better to waste one's youth than to do nothing with it at all.

Georges Courteline, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/04lm8ot1  ·  submitted 1997

Passionate hatred can give meaning and purpose to an empty life.

Eric Hoffer, in Love and Hate