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Aphorisms Galore! lets you Feed Your Wit by browsing, searching, submitting, discussing, and rating aphorisms and witty sayings by famous and not-so-famous people.
Welcome! The computer thought you might be interested in these aphorisms today, taking into account things like their recent popularities, their ratings, and how new they are to the collection:
tiny.ag/ucas5skv · ★★☆☆ Fair (1249 ratings) · submitted 1997
Life is the childhood of our immortality.
tiny.ag/nvfl7j9k · ★★☆☆ Fair (522 ratings) · submitted 1997
Don't worry about people stealing your ideas. If your ideas are any good, you'll have to ram them down people's throats.
tiny.ag/ls2p5dcg · ★★☆☆ Fair (283 ratings) · submitted 1997
Sloppy thinking gets worse over time.
tiny.ag/x06lwkz4 · ★★☆☆ Fair (555 ratings) · submitted 1997
Life's tragedy is that we get old to soon and wise too late.
tiny.ag/tuvabnig · ★★☆☆ Fair (890 ratings) · submitted 1999
Death is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down. The difference between sex and death is that with death you can do it alone and no one is going to make fun of you.
Woody Allen, in Life and Death and Love and Hate
tiny.ag/mgtvsjqa · ★★☆☆ Fair (415 ratings) · submitted 1997
Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.
Thomas Alva Edison, in Success and Failure and Work and Recreation
tiny.ag/c6jkeq5x · ★★☆☆ Fair (811 ratings) · submitted 1997
I don't necessarily agree with everything I say.
tiny.ag/m6lj8yot · ★★☆☆ Fair (255 ratings) · submitted 1997
Democracy does not guarantee equality of conditions -- it only guarantees equality of opportunity.
tiny.ag/vmqykh2c · ★★☆☆ Fair (1049 ratings) · submitted 1997
The Lord gave us farmers two strong hands so we could grab as much as we could with both of them.
Joseph Heller, Catch-22, in Work and Recreation
tiny.ag/odq1svy5 · ★★☆☆ Fair (368 ratings) · submitted 1997
We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up.
tiny.ag/ojpztwu9 · ★★☆☆ Fair (420 ratings) · submitted 1997
Born a saint, die a sinner -- born a sinner, die a saint.
tiny.ag/tvfsj7gx · ★★☆☆ Fair (433 ratings) · submitted 1997
I don't feel good.
Luther Burbank, (dying words), in Life and Death
tiny.ag/0spygbpd · ★★☆☆ Fair (535 ratings) · submitted 1997
Money may be the husk of many things, but not the kernel. It buys you food, but not appetite; medicine, but not health; acquaintances, but not friends; servants, but not loyalty; days of joy, but not peace or happiness.
tiny.ag/z91tc0go · ★★☆☆ Fair (430 ratings) · submitted 1997
It's better to keep your mouth shut and give the impression that you're stupid than to open it and remove all doubt.
tiny.ag/hyedkhd2 · ★★☆☆ Fair (330 ratings) · submitted 1997
It is the province of knowledge to speak, and it is the privilege of wisdom to listen.
tiny.ag/orx9er1h · ★★☆☆ Fair (383 ratings) · submitted 1997
The wind and waves are always on the side of the ablest navigators.
tiny.ag/toiqhdlg · ★★☆☆ Fair (405 ratings) · submitted 1997
Anybody who wants the presidency so much that he'll spend two years organizing and campaigning for it is not to be trusted with the office.
tiny.ag/950guyxd · ★★☆☆ Fair (479 ratings) · submitted 1997
I like pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals.
tiny.ag/hh0kfr5w · ★★☆☆ Fair (415 ratings) · submitted 1997
The most likely way for the world to be destroyed, most experts agree, is by accident. That's where we come in; we're computer professionals. We cause accidents.
tiny.ag/w4s36qc2 · ★★☆☆ Fair (502 ratings) · submitted 1997
A friend might well be reckoned the masterpiece of nature.