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We would often be sorry if our wishes were gratified.

Aesop, in Happiness and Misery and Success and Failure

A friend might well be reckoned the masterpiece of nature.

Ralph Waldo Emerson, in Love and Hate

To accomplish great things, you must not only act but also dream, not only dream but also believe.

Anatole France, in Success and Failure

In war, there is no substitute for victory.

Douglas MacArthur, in War and Peace

I don't necessarily agree with everything I say.

Marshall McLuhan, in Science and Religion

The opposite of a profound truth may well be another profound truth.

Niels Bohr, in Science and Religion

You can lead a boy to college, but you cannot make him think.

Elbert Hubbard, in Wisdom and Ignorance

A woman is only a woman, but a good cigar is a smoke.

Rudyard Kipling, in Men and Women and Vice and Virtue

I hope life isn't a joke, because I don't get it.

Jack Handey, in Life and Death

Money may be the husk of many things, but not the kernel. It buys you food, but not appetite; medicine, but not health; acquaintances, but not friends; servants, but not loyalty; days of joy, but not peace or happiness.

Henrik Ibsen, in Wealth and Poverty

Bad policies, stupid policies, gutless policies have real consequences.

Molly Ivins, in Law and Politics

The Puritans hated bear-baiting, not because it gave pain to the bear, but because it gave pleasure to the spectators.

Thomas Macaulay, History of England, I, in Vice and Virtue

Why be a man when you can be a success?

Bertolt Brecht, in Success and Failure

It's better to waste one's youth than to do nothing with it at all.

Georges Courteline, in Life and Death

By working faithfully eight hours a day, you may eventually get to be boss and work twelve.

Robert Frost, in Success and Failure and Work and Recreation

I've never met a healthy person who worried much about his health or a good person who worried much about his soul.

Haldane, in Health and Disease and Vice and Virtue

He who knows that enough is enough will always have enough.

Lao Tsu, in Wealth and Poverty

Riot: A popular entertainment given to the military by innocent bystanders.

Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in War and Peace

A celebrity is a person who is known for his well-knownness.

Daniel Boorstin, in Success and Failure

Let's have some new clichés.

Samuel Goldwyn, in Art and Literature