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Aphorisms Galore! lets you Feed Your Wit by browsing, searching, submitting, discussing, and rating aphorisms and witty sayings by famous and not-so-famous people.

Welcome! The computer thought you might be interested in these aphorisms today, taking into account things like their recent popularities, their ratings, and how new they are to the collection:

Comment#  ·   Fair (374 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997  · 

You can lead a boy to college, but you cannot make him think.

Elbert Hubbard, in Wisdom and Ignorance

Comment#  ·   Fair (331 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997  · 

The happiness of the bee and the dolphin is to exist. For man it is to know that and to wonder at it.

Jacques Cousteau, in Life and Death

Comment#  ·   Fair (286 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Never offend people with style when you can offend them with substance.

Sam Brown, (Washington Post, 1977), in Wisdom and Ignorance

Comment#  ·   Fair (549 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Life is not lost by dying; life is lost minute by minute, day by dragging day, in all the thousand small uncaring ways.

Stephen Vincent Benét, in Life and Death

Comment#  ·   Fair (430 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997  · 

It's better to keep your mouth shut and give the impression that you're stupid than to open it and remove all doubt.

Rami Belson, in Wisdom and Ignorance

Comment#  ·   Fair (405 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Anybody who wants the presidency so much that he'll spend two years organizing and campaigning for it is not to be trusted with the office.

David Broder, in Law and Politics

Comment#  ·   Fair (473 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997  · 

He that would perfect his work must first sharpen his tools.

Confucius, in Work and Recreation

Comment#  ·   Fair (370 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997  · 

I am become death, shatterer of worlds.

Robert J. Oppenheimer, (quoting the Bhagavadgita after witnessing the first nuclear explosion), in War and Peace

Comment#  ·   Fair (472 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

I will answer anything I can with honor, but not about others.

John Brown, in Vice and Virtue

Comment#  ·   Fair (234 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Imagination is the one weapon in the war against reality.

Jules de Gaultier, in Wisdom and Ignorance

Comment#  ·   Fair (304 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

My theology, briefly, is that the universe was dictated but not signed.

Christopher Morley, in Science and Religion

Comment#  ·   Fair (1649 ratings)  ·  submitted 1999

Everybody wants to save the earth; nobody wants to help Mom do the dishes.

P. J. O'Rourke, All the Trouble in the World, in Altruism and Cynicism and Work and Recreation

Comment#  ·   Fair (894 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997 by Brad Johnson

I'd rather die while I'm living than live while I'm dead.

Jimmy Buffett, in Life and Death

Comment#  ·   Fair (632 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

I prefer the most unjust peace to the most righteous war.

Cicero, in War and Peace

Comment#  ·   Fair (368 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997  · 

We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up.

Phyllis Diller, in Life and Death

Comment#  ·   Fair (986 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

The face of a child can say it all, especially the mouth part of the face.

Jack Handey, Deep Thoughts, in Life and Death

Deep Thoughts (paperback)

Comment#  ·   Fair (420 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Born a saint, die a sinner -- born a sinner, die a saint.

Doug Horton, in Vice and Virtue

Comment#  ·   Fair (305 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Whatever is not nailed down is mine. What I can pry loose is not nailed down.

Collis P. Huntington, in Altruism and Cynicism

Comment#  ·   Fair (610 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

If we fight a war and win it with H-bombs, what history will remember is not the ideals we were fighting for but the methods we used to accomplish them. These methods will be compared to the warfare of Genghis Khan who ruthlessly killed every last inhabitant of Persia.

Hans A. Bethe, in War and Peace

Comment#  ·   Fair (455 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Everyone has his day and some days last longer than others.

Winston Churchill, in Success and Failure

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