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Aphorisms Galore! lets you Feed Your Wit by browsing, searching, submitting, discussing, and rating aphorisms and witty sayings by famous and not-so-famous people.

Welcome! The computer thought you might be interested in these aphorisms today, taking into account things like their recent popularities, their ratings, and how new they are to the collection:

Comment#  ·   Fair (3392 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

For a man to achieve all that is demanded of him, he must regard himself as greater than he is.

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, in Vice and Virtue and Work and Recreation

Comment#  ·   Fair (405 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Anybody who wants the presidency so much that he'll spend two years organizing and campaigning for it is not to be trusted with the office.

David Broder, in Law and Politics

Comment#  ·   Fair (935 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997  · 

Life is like a sewer -- what you get out of it depends on what you put into it.

Tom Lehrer, (from the album An Evening Wasted), in Life and Death

An Evening Wasted (audio CD)

Comment#  ·   Fair (591 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997  · 

There are three kinds of lies: Lies, Damn Lies, and Statistics.

Benjamin Disraeli, in Science and Religion

Comment#  ·   Fair (550 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

I don't know with what weapons World War III will be fought, but World War IV will be fought with sticks and stones.

Albert Einstein, in War and Peace

Comment#  ·   Fair (692 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

A diet is when you watch what you eat and wish you could eat what you watch.

Hermione Gingold, in Food and Drink

Comment#  ·   Fair (256 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

There is no security on this earth; there is only opportunity.

Douglas MacArthur, in Success and Failure

Comment#  ·   Fair (1041 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Delay is preferable to error.

Thomas Jefferson, in Success and Failure

Comment#  ·   Fair (290 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Passionate hatred can give meaning and purpose to an empty life.

Eric Hoffer, in Love and Hate

Comment#  ·   Fair (378 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Be your own hero, it's cheaper than a movie ticket.

Doug Horton, in Altruism and Cynicism

Comment#  ·   Fair (552 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal.

Albert Camus, in Work and Recreation

Comment#  ·   Fair (1391 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

It is by will alone that I set my mind in motion.

Frank Herbert, Dune, in Work and Recreation

Dune (paperback)

Comment#  ·   Fair (651 ratings)  ·  submitted 1998

An aphorism is not an aphorism unless you know what it means.

Winston Churchill, in Wisdom and Ignorance

Comment#  ·   Fair (257 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Silence is argument carried out by other means.

Ernesto "Che" Guevara, in Wisdom and Ignorance

Comment#  ·   Fair (201 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Change occurs in direct proportion to dissatisfaction, but dissatisfaction never changes.

Doug Horton, in Success and Failure

Comment#  ·   Fair (890 ratings)  ·  submitted 1999  · 

Death is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down. The difference between sex and death is that with death you can do it alone and no one is going to make fun of you.

Woody Allen, in Life and Death and Love and Hate

Comment#  ·   Fair (298 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

An honest politician is one who, when he is bought, will stay bought.

Simon Cameron, in Altruism and Cynicism and Law and Politics

Comment#  ·   Fair (555 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Life's tragedy is that we get old to soon and wise too late.

Benjamin Franklin, in Wisdom and Ignorance

Comment#  ·   Fair (1100 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997

Yield to temptation -- it may not pass your way again.

Robert A. Heinlein, Time Enough for Love (Lazarus Long), in Vice and Virtue

Time Enough for Love (paperback)

Comment#  ·   Fair (517 ratings)  ·  submitted 1997  · 

It is not necessary to understand things in order to argue about them.

Pierre Augustin Caron de Beaumarchais, in Science and Religion

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